The methods I mentioned above will select the records in your source table that don't have a corresponding feature in your shapefile. If you want to select features that don't have a matching record in the stand alone table I would use a relate. Relate the standalone table to the shapefile, select all of the records in your table and click on the "Related Tables" button along the top of the table window -
That's going to give you all of the features that match your table. Reverse the selection and you have the features that don't match.
Jeff Ward
Summit County, Utah