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There is a way to access ArcObjects from python.
There is a Stack Exchange thread titled: How do I access ArcObjects from Python?
http://gis.stackexchange.com/questions/80/how-do-i-access-arcobjects-from-python
that gives some leads on this.
It IS, however, both exasperating and annoying to keep hearing things along the lines of
"python scripting is not intended to do things like <fill in simple task here>".