This is an old post, so I'm not sure if this method was around at the time, but since this thread came up in my search for an answer to the same problem, I thought I would add my solution. I'm using ArcGIS API for Javascript 3.23.
Basically, I added an event listener on the feature layer that was tied to the feature table. Anytime an edit is made on the feature layer, the feature table is refreshed. Note that any selections the user has made within the feature table will be rest. This works for the edits made from the toolbar as well (Delete, Undo, etc.)
<featurelayer>.on("edits-complete", function() {
<featuretable>.refresh();
});
*First time posting, sorry if I have violated any rules.
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