Jeremy,
If you truly want to pursue these ArcGIS Pro issues I reported here, I need to be able to contact you via a private message. I can not do this at the moment, because you are not following me, or we aren't 'friends' yet here in GeoNet (oh these modern times where anybody needs to be a friend to get anything done on the internet...)
The tool I am talking about is a giant personal project I have been working on for the past three years. I can make this available to you for testing through some direct contacts I have at ESRI inc, but not here on GeoNet.