Hello my fellow ESRI test-subjects I mean customers,
I am trying to publish a story map with a custom Theme I created. When editing the Story Map, the template looks correct (custom colors, etc.):

However, after I Publish the story it defaults to the ESRI default "Summit" theme:

Not sure what's going on here, likely a bug that ESRI knows about but has chosen to ignore until someone complains (here I am monopolistic overlords! please come to my rescue!)
Thank you for any relevant help